I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
