so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
