i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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