YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
