yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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