do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
