I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I want to fling myself into the sun
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Randomize
