sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
