Quick, to the slutcave!
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I have already put on my inside pants.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
