If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
