I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
