I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
vagina is talking i cant
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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