Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Randomize