just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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