Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
