If that was your dad, he is hot
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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