I'll bet she douches with gravy.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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