Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
