In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
