you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
