so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Randomize
