You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
This girl is more easily done than said...
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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