She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
