if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
