I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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