shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
