he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
