WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
