Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
