careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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