I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
