The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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