I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
