I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
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