I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
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