Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
and i looked up. we had an audience...
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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