And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Randomize
