I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
