We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
