I think scott just propositioned me for sex
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize