I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Is Oprah even human
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
