I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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