Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
