Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
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