I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
