New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
