It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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