What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
