Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Randomize
