8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
