Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
